Friday, March 09, 2007

Things that are green

Polka dots are green, sometimes, as in the case of this new dress which I purchased at a store that has fake grass for carpeting -- also a thing that is green. I haven't worn the dress yet. It is cold in Portland. It rains. I am waiting patiently to wear my new dress.

Other things that are green include absinthe, mint-chocolate-chip ice cream, leprechauns, vintage glass cake stands that happen to be green, flower stems clutched in a nervous fist, gangrene, moss, and some, but not all, apples. And some, but not all, macaws. Also, my slippers.

I just had a memory of the sickly sweet tropical liquer we American teens drank in the Belgium of my teenhood. It tasted most like bananas, but was vivid vivid green. In recollection: ick. It was called, bizarrely, "Pzang."

Also, on the subject of green and polka-dots, one of the "top models" was wearing my exact green polka-dotted pajamas on the show the week. It was Jael, who I don't hate, even though she talks like she can't be bothered to part her lips. Who I do hate is Renee. She seems like an incredibly miserable human being. Have you ever known one of those people to whom everything is "unfair"? The whole world is a conspiracy against them? That's Renee. A pretty, bitter, miserable girl against the world. But much more important than Renee's misery, is my polka dot simpatico with America's Next Top Model. Last season, they had polka dotted bedspreads that I almost bought. I mean, is that uncanny or what?

Here are some more green things, some of which I've already mentioned. The glared-out label is absinthe purchased a few years ago in Prague.

I had been to Prague previously, say, eleven years ago (before all the menus there were printed in six tourist-friendly languages) and had bought a bottle of absinthe which I had no intention of drinking because, well, absinthe tastes bad. But a "friend" who was over one evening several years ago and browbeat Jim and I into letting him "taste" it. And well, he drank it. A lot of it. And he was really sorry he did. I refilled that bottle with green mouthwash because I really only cared about the bottle anyway. But this, this is the real thing, and no friend will wheedle me out of it. The end.

P.S. Sorry to be weird today (not really). I don't know what came over me. I met my daily word count by 9:30 a.m. Whoosh!!! So I'm going to try to double it. AND make cookies. Have a great weekend, folks!

P.P.S. Any local (Portland OR) readers who might be interested in attending a book party for the fabulous Patry Francis this Sunday, email me.

P.P.S. I just heard that vampire hunters exhumed Slobodan Milosevic's grave and staked him through the heart. What a weird world.


jennifer said...

I love this green post...

Did you now that Camille has green and white polka dot converse high tops? She LOVES them!

She is my polka dot girl!

Check out my blog to see pix of them :)

Alexandra S said...

That dress is so YOU that if I had seen it first I think I would have had to get it for you! Maybe you should wear it with your red and whiete striped tights and your polka dot heels-you'll look like a whacked out Christmas tree but very, very festive with a big giant silver star on your head, And thats really, really bizarre about Milosevic. I really wish he had lived to spend the rest of his life in prison.

Amber said...

I felt a little weird today as well. I woke up from a dream in which the writer who did a critique for me, Laura Preble, was ALSO Tori Amos. I groveled, wanting her autograph, and woke up in a sleepy buzz.

BTW... green is lovely. Everything here seems to be red today. The bougainvillea, a pen staring at me from a cup, the cars on the road, and my daughters lips.

Sophie said...

Holy doodles!

I love love love green!

It is my most fave color -

(elves are green)

I am Irish -

so i surely loved this
greenly post.

And oh - i love polkadots.

deirdre said...

I love polka dots too, but only on navy blue or black dresses. And pretty bottles too. I always want to line them up in a window to catch the light and reflect it around the room.

Frida said...

By 9.30am? Did you start terribly early or is that hoop really careening along? Yah!

Green is often my favorite colour (I have to change favorite from time to time so that none of the colours miss out). It is a lovely colour to wear in spring so I hope Portland gets there soon.


[a} said...

green was my first "favourite" colour, since it was the colour of my mom's eyes..

i love it when you're supposedly weird! you remind me so much of this friend in canada!

is slobodan a real person?? :-o

Anonymous said...

It's me, Slobodan, and just because I started four wars in my region within ten years and was responsible for the genocide of tens of thousands of people across Yugoslavia and the Balkans doesn't mean I deserve to be exhumed by vampires. I have feelings too, you know.

Jim Di Bartolo said...

And we actually learned about the Slobodan news from the same friend who drank the Absinthe and had the worst hangover of his life the next day! See, this post is SO inter-related and tangled amongst itself it's just unreal!


Alexandra S said...

I can't believe Slobodan left you a comment-creepy!

chest of drawers said...

This Slobodan story is freaking me out - there hasn´t been a word about it in the papers or on the news here in Austria.

Anonymous said...


Just wanted to delurk and say hello :-) I actually am from belgium and/or the netherlands, and i know that liquor you wrote about! The name though is Pisang Ambon, Pisang meaning ´banana´ in the indonesian language... why it is yellow i do not know.... i do know that its yo sweet your theeth fall out!